WHEN is a star not a star, asks Paul Drury, who explains: "Taxi driver brother-in-law tells me, 'Had one of those blokes from River City in the back of the cab once'. He only knew because the passenger mentioned he was an actor with a part in the popular BBC Scotland soap. 'Really?' said my brother-in-law. 'I've watched it a couple of times recently and I can't remember seeing you'. 'Aye,' replied the thespian. 'I've been in a coma for a while'."

FIRST Minister Nicola Sturgeon can be a deft hand on the old social media malarkey. When some chap went on Twitter to attempt humour after Scotland's Six Nations defeat and wrote: "Breaking news. Nicola Sturgeon seeks an England v Scotland rematch as the result isn't to her liking" Nicola merely replied: "Who leaked this?"

ONE of the new routes out of Glasgow Airport is Wizz Airlines with a three times a week flight to Budapest, a Unesco World Heritage Site with the Museum of Fine Arts, the Hungarian National Gallery, Buda Castle and the Liberty Statue amongst its attractions.

Clearly the culture is a strong attraction as a Newton Mearns Diary reader tells us she was on the flight last week when a group of Glasgow lads got on board with identical T-shirts bearing the legend "Budapished!"

RANGERS fans greatly amused by old-timer Clint Hill, at 38 the oldest player on the pitch, scoring a late equaliser yesterday to deny Celtic an 18th straight win. As one football fan joked: "Now that was a goal he'll want to tell the grandkids about. In fact he can do it when he visits them tomorrow."

GETTING old continued. A reader passes on the comment from American actress Ruth Buzzi: "My last birthday has done wonders for me.

"Wonder where I left my keys, wonder why it's so hard to get up, wonder why my joints crackle."

SO you think the bands you liked were so cutting edge, and then you realise your kids haven't a clue who you are going on about. Stephen Miller passes on a conversation from the touchline of a schools rugby match as one dad remarks: "It's terrible. My son doesn't know who the Ramones were."

"Weren't they the people who voted against Brexit?" says a second dad.

"No, they built all the roads," chipped in a third.

TODAY'S piece of daftness comes from a Bishopbriggs reader who emails: "I was hooked on auctions after only going once...going twice."

AND a Bearsden reader has a recurring thought most weekends. "I made a huge to do list for today. I just can't work out who's going to do it."

THE Herald archive pic of the donkeys at Ayr beach reminds George Tomlinson: "What do the donkeys at Ayr beach get for their lunch? Half-an-hour, the same as at Blackpool.

"Aye, the old ones are the best."