WORD to the wise. If one must have an embarrassing brain fade on Woman’s Hour, it is best not to do so on the day you are booked to do BBC1’s The One Show in the evening.
If any occasion called for serious diversionary tactics it was Jeremy Corbyn’s appearance last night. Would the third Mrs Corbyn relent and be his wing-woman? Or would Jezza whip out the family cat, El Gato, as a surprise for presenters Alex Jones and Ore Oduba?
Mr Corbyn did not need to do either because The One Show does politics the way cats do cross Channel swimming, and he had something else to offer: old photos.
Before we saw them, Jones had the “May question” to ask. Where there boy jobs and girl jobs in the Corbyn household? Jeremy shook his head and launched into an anecdote about hedge-trimming and breaking concrete. You probably had to be there.
Best move on to the photos. We saw Jeremy as a toddler in reins. “I was a bit free-spirited, I kept climbing out the pram and running off.” There he was with his grandfather. “A solicitor in Ealing.” Next, a picture of Jeremy doing VSO in Jamaica. It should have been the cue for a single great anecdote but instead there was a jumble of reminiscences and another opportunity was missed.
An ever more desperate Jones then bowled Mr Corbyn a googly by bringing up his two “E” levels at A-level. Did they do exams in child care funding or manifesto awareness back then?
The body language of Jones and Oreduba said it all. When she wasn’t saying “Aw…”, Oreduba was screwing up his eyes in puzzlement or boredom. It was like a conversation between a teacher and two not very bright pupils on a coach trip to a drainage museum.
Luckily, The One Show had something up its sleeve: a quiz featuring Jeremy’s favourite objects: manhole covers. The first one he had to identify was made by Thomas Crapper (insert own joke here, viewers), the second involved a picture of his allotment. What does Jeremy grow on his allotment? Berries! And what do berries make? Prizes! No, silly, they make jam. Jeremy had brought some home-made stuff in for his inquisitors. If only he had done that on Woman’s Hour. But he lives and learns. With a week till polling day, he better learn faster than this.
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