YOU cannot be serious. This week, John McEnroe opened his Big Apple-sized mouth and declared Andy Murray to be a “distant fourth” in the line-up of Wimbledon favourites. He added, for good measure, Serena Williams is possibly the 700th best player in the world, (behind 699 men) and suggested he could still take her.
And the world is making a racket.
But what’s the problem? In terms of Grand Slam arithmetic McEnroe can clearly count, and he probably could beat Williams. He’s certainly not being sexist. (Mac argues for equal pay, despite women playing three Grand Slam sets). And come on, he has a new autobiography to publicise. So why try to stop him making cheeky drop shots?
Friday night’s Tracey Ullman Show featured a very clever sketch about a self-help group for people who need to think the same way. The premise was a protest against hollow emptiness, about the dangers of a society in which we’re encouraged to say very little. And it was right on the money because the dissident voice is being diluted.
In recent days, comedy actor Ford Kiernan Tweeted to his 50,000 followers he didn’t rate Emily Sande’s Glastonbury performance at all. Yet, his colourful description of the non-event resulted in national newspaper coverage.
Two days ago, a right-leaning broadsheet launched an attack on BBC political editor Laura Kuenssberg claiming she’s a “lightning rod for public vitriol”, suggesting the Scots journalist’s critical voice was a little too loud. Yet, bizarrely, the paper acknowledged she attacks all political sides with the same gusto.
On a more personal level, a weekend appearance on Radio Scotland’s Shereen programme was fun, and the show encourages contrasting opinions - which is why I felt it safe to describe the Proclaimers (apropos their recent documentary) as being as interesting as a couple of Chemistry teachers and the alchemists of just three (albeit cracking) songs.
Now, the result was a lovely ding dong with Big Issue editor Paul McNamee (leading into his robust defence of one-hit wonders Dexys Midnight Runners) - but afterwards the social media and text comment re the Proclaimers diss suggested I’d declared myself to be a secret DUP supporter, or a Satanist, whichever is worse.
Does not liking the Proclaimers mean I’m trashing my cultural heritage?
It’s not to say there aren’t strong opinions out there. And we have to be careful about social media content. There is no place for the injurious, the racist or sexist and certainly not defamatory. But expressions of preference have to be allowed. Ideas and thoughts driven underground have a power to grow in the darkness.
That’s why you have to have Katie Hopkins figures. It’s incontrovertible the woman who describes immigrants as cockroaches is not someone you would have in your house, unless that house is a damp Gothic hell-hole situated at the end of a dark, creepy, bat-filled lane. But her success as columnist suggests a huge following, and if she’s allowed to go public she can at least be challenged, and others can hear the counter argument.
This week, Prince Harry was derided for revealing some Royals didn’t want the top job and it was claimed he should shut up and be grateful he doesn’t live in a council flat in Possil. And that’s true. But what’s also true is the Royal voice also opens up the debate about Monarchy spending et al. And those telling this Royal to shut up were probably the same people applauding Prince William for his revelations about depression.
Right now, we’re celebrating the 50th anniversary of The Graduate. Dustin Hoffman’s Benjamin Braddock wasn’t the perfect role model in that he got up to hotel hi-jinx with his parents’ friend, while dating her daughter, but the strength of the film is that Benjamin did reveal a voice, (albeit a mumbling New York voice), which declared he wouldn’t be pushed into thinking the same way as everyone around him.
We shouldn’t compromise on honesty. We don’t expect Theresa May to say “Come on, Arlene, you’ve blackmailed me into bed with a political party some of whose members deny the existence of dinosaurs - surely you’ve heard of The Flintstones?” but at hint of honesty about her strategy would serve us better.
We don’t need alternative facts, but we do need alternative voices. Scots vocality has long been our strength, from Enlightement figures such as David Hume and Adam Smith to John McLean to Billy Connolly and Sir Alex Ferguson.
We don’t need to be held back by Trigger Warnings, or social demands for uniformity or worry about the Snowflake Generation who don’t wish to hear views which contrast their own. Ian Hislop spoke recently of Open Mind solutions to immigration. That implies open voices.
That’s why it’s perfectly fine to announce the new Texas single reveals all the melodic content of an air conditioner.
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