NEW stories, old news.
In the headlines this week: Craig Savage is accused of stealing a rifle and shooting his estranged wife, Michelle Savage, six times. He is then accused of shooting her mother, Heather Whitbread, seven times, before turning the gun on Mrs Savage’s dog Zeus.
Lewes Crown Court was told Mr Savage bombarded Mrs Savage with text messages, threatened her with revenge porn and slashed her cars tyres.
The trial is under way and I make no comment on Mr Savage’s guilt or innocence. But the reporting of the crime dredges up issues discussed a hundred times.
Multiple newspapers have referred to the alleged killer as a “jilted lover”. Jilted lover. And there you have it: careless, lazy, ultimately damaging words. This type of reporting shifts responsibility to women.
Such reporting shows a lack of respect for women’s autonomy, making them bit part players in men’s stories and making excuses where no excuses exist.
As the impact of Universal Credit starts to show - claimants left without money during the transition or finding themselves with a reduce income - a side effect is the sheer gift the new system gives to domestic abusers. The single payments made to households make it so much easier for a controlling partner to carry out financial abuse.
From the serious to the seriously irritating. Piers Morgan, in another of his effective attention grabbing stunts, complained about the actor Daniel Craig carrying his baby in a papoose. "Emasculated Bond," was his tweeted take at the sight of Mr Craig with infant slung across his chest. Presumably Piers was unable to carry any of his own four children due to dragging a club in one hand and his wife by the hair with the other.
Which was louder: the snap as Mr Morgan's fragile masculinity cracked or the rumble of a million pairs of eyes rolling?
Leaving aside the real man/fictional character confusion in the tweet, it's long past time that men taking a part in rearing their children raises comment.
Then, Waitrose has come under ire for its Gentleman’s Smoked Chicken Caesar Roll. Woman are also fond of the occasional spot of chicken Caesar and don't see why we shouldn't have some. Naughty Waitrose. Don't its marketing staff understand that there's no appetite - pun intended - for gender segregated consumerism anymore?
Kimberly-Clark has cottoned on. The parent company of Kleenex is rebranding its Mansize tissues due to an increase in the number of complaints about the sexist name. The firm said it does not "believe that the Mansize branding suggests or endorses gender inequality" but appreciates it needs to move with the times.
To the celebrity pages and Lady Gaga speaking at a Women In Hollywood event on Monday, telling the gathering that she had chosen to wear a trouser suit, rather than a gown, because she wanted to “take the power back” by dressing in a more typically masculine way.
"All that would matter," she said of her attendance at the event, "Was what I wore to this red carpet."
She spoke of being a survivor of male sexual assault, of the impact on her mental health of the attack and the damage done by female stars being viewed as part of a competitive "giant beauty pageant".
As I was reading about Lady Gaga, the website's algorithm suggested I might also like to read about a sexy Meghan Markle wedding Halloween costume. I'll spare you the description.
New details but the same issues, week after week. Unthinkingly sexist coverage of domestic abuse issues. Government policy that negatively impacts women. Male, pale and stale sigh-inducing pronouncements. Witless gendered marketing. The fight against objectification.
There has been much talk lately about how men can be allies of women. Recently Justice Secretary Humza Yousaf called on men to "stand up and be counted in the fight against misogyny”. Male passivity is part of the problem, he said.
He's right, and men increasingly recognise that. On Twitter a grassroots moving is stirring among Scottish men looking to help. There are already men and organisations doing such work: Graham Goulden, a former chief inspector with the Scottish Violence Reduction Unit, is one; the White Ribbon Campaign is another.
The more men women have on board in the battle to move on from these same old, same old issues - across the spectrum of severity - the more likely we are to resolve them. So listen to women. We don't need White Knights, we need to share the burden.
It can be exhausting to be critical, correcting, clarifying, arguing all the time. Join in. Don't stay silent when political decisions threaten women. Don't allow your peers to objectify, minimise and belittle women. Don't let fragile masculinity get in the way of holding the baby - literally and figuratively.
Of course we need men on board in order to create an equal society where all participants are valued so it will be interesting to see if these small calls to action lead to anything bigger.
Women have been shouting about these issues a long time now. We're happy you're here now but what's taken so long?
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