Are we nearly there yet?

MUCH discussion on Theresa May sending a letter to mark the official start to Britain leaving the European Union yesterday. We liked the explanation of author Emma Kennedy who said: "Do you know what Brexit is? It's your dad, in the car, refusing to ask anyone for directions."

A knock-out

THE Herald's obituary of boxing manager Lou Duva reminds reader Bill Rutherford in Galashiels: "There once was a quote from Lou, which could only come from a boxing promoter, when he said, 'Every five or ten years along comes the fight of the century'."

Sounds like something a member of the SNP would say.

She was raging

TALKING of the SNP, Scots Tory leader Ruth Davidson has been asked to apologise after making fun of SNP MSP Joan McAlpine's accent.

Curiously that reminds us of when Joan co-wrote a book with former MSP Tommy Sheridan on the Poll Tax campaign which publishers Polygon originally listed in its catalogue as "A Time to Reach" although it was actually called "A Time to Rage". Turned out that Tommy had left the name of the book on Polygon's answering machine and an Edinburgh member of staff had mistaken his strong Glasgow accent.

Your mother should know

A READER hears a student on Byres Road telling his mate: "It's funny, but I left a door open in the house the other day and my mum asked if I was born in a barn. I told her that seemed an odd question for if anyone should know where I was born, you'd think it would be her."

Hair raising

WITH all this Brexit stuff, we shouldn't forget what Donald Trump is up to in America. A reader in the States explains: "As he starts to cut environmental legislation put in place by Obama, Donald Trump says the hole in the ozone layer can be covered by simply combing some over from the side."

Legless pub-goer

READER John Neil wonders if Scottish court cases have become a lot more serious than they used to be. He only asks as he came across an old Evening Times from the sixties with a report from Hamilton Sheriff Court which began: "A man who had been thrown out of a Lanarkshire pub during a late-night party sat on the pavement outside, unfastened his artificial legs - and threw them through the pub windows."

Bit of a panto

WE thought our musings on the Citz Theatre Pantos in Glasgow always having 13 letters in their names were pretty non-controversial, but now reader Russell Smith in Kilbrinie weighs in with: "Is it just coincidence that SNP Referendum, SNP Parliament and May Westminster all have 13 letters as befitting the pantomimes at Holyrood and Westminster?" Good point Russell - apart from May Westminster having 14 letters. Dunce's cap Russell!

Running off his mouth

WE were enjoying the sunshine out the office window when a colleage crept up and announced: "There’s a reason I’m giving up my gym membership. It’s not working out."