Taps aff

SUNSHINE in Glasgow yesterday. John Mulholland heard a chap in the pub declare: “My wife announced that she fancied going for a drive with the top off. That worried me - we don’t have a convertible. “

Taps on

AND a young woman in Glasgow’s city centre told her pal: “Haven’tsen any guys take their tops off, despite the hot weather. Long may that continue.”

Fly guy

OUR tale about the band playing “Hello Dali” to the famous painter reminds John Henderson: “Glasgow’s Arnold Brown was the comedic warm-up act for Frank Sinatra at Ibrox Park in 1990.

“He says Frank asked before the show for some local insight and tips, and Arnold suggested in his laconic manner that Frank could perhaps address the Scottishness of the occasion by opening with Fly Me to Dunoon. Frank demurred for some reason, he says.”

Taking the Micky

COCKNEY stand-up Micky Flanagan is appearing at the Hydro in Glasgow tonight. He once remarked: “I was asked to go on the TV show Who Do You Think You Are? I told them that where I come from, that sounds like the start of a fight.”

Bit of a blow

PIPE bands continued. Gordon Casely tells us that an American TV company, in Aberdeen last week to film an Alaskan family settling in the Granite City, came across the Rubislaw Pipe Band playing outside a civic reception.

Says Gordon: “The director asked if he could film them so the pipes and drums continued playing long after their scheduled time. The producer thanked the band, and pressed a note into a piper’s hand. ‘That’s from us, with our thanks’. It was a fiver, yes, a haill fiver.”

Seems Aberdeen’s infamous financial carefulness quickly spreads to visitors.

Paying the penalty

THIS month’s Nae Luck Award goes to the senior citizens from New Cumnock who set off to Cumbernauld to watch Glenafton Athletic hopefully beat Rob Roy to win the West of Scotland Junior Superleague.

The group, with over 200 years of supporting the Glen amongst them, took the wrong route, ended up trapped in the traffic chaos at the Raith Interchange on the M74 and had to rely on texts to learn the Glen had indeed won the league, before turning for home.

Shooting the peas

WE asked what you did at school, but never afterwards, and Jamie Rae says: “All chanting good morning to the boss in unison before starting a day’s work,” and David Donaldson recalls: “Back then I could hit a lug-hole at ten paces using only a Bic pen casing and some pearl barley.”

The golf club driver

GROWING old continued. Says an Ayrshire reader: “Chap in the golf club is retiring next week. I asked him what he was going to do with his time. He told me, ‘Get up early in the morning and drive around really slowly making everyone late for work’.”