IT was not so much Beware the Ides of March but Embrace the Ides of March as the chief comrade missed yet another golden opportunity to plunge in the political dagger, this time over the UK Government's screeching U-turn on NICs.
Such has become the regular ineffectualness of the head Red at PMQs that one can imagine Maggie May chose to announce her embarrassing tax volteface just before the weekly Commons joust because she knows Jezza will be bound to miss the target and fail to capitalise on her discomfort.
And so it was. True, the Labour chief only had 20 minutes to prepare his barbs but given the large and looming target before him surely he couldn’t possibly miss it? Could he?
It was up to Conservative backbencher Huw Merriman with the first question to enable the PM to get her defence in first and announce albeit subtly how this lady was for turning.
When Maggie May – with a straight face – insisted that the NICs hike had been consistent with the Government’s tax-lock legislation Labour and SNP MPs fell about in disbelief.
Such was the racket the Speaker stood up to declare: “This is intolerable!” Opposition MPs nodded and cheered hear hear, believing he was not commenting on the noise levels but on the PM’s barefaced effrontery.
When Jezza declared the Government was “in a bit of chaos” the Tory berserkers let rip, bellowing their mockery at the Labour leader, whom they regard as the epitome of chaos.
Mother Theresa had a readymade response, saying: “I normally stand at this Dispatch Box and say I will not take any lectures from the Right Honourable Gentleman but when it comes to lectures on chaos he would be the first person I’d turn to.”
The chief comrade then stood up to berate the Government over cuts but failed to ask a question to which the PM snipped to Tory laughter: “I do not think he has got the hang of this. He is supposed to ask me a question when he stands up.”
As the raucous PMQs ding-dong continued Jezza appeared to go into slow motion and gave a stuttering performance that at one point had the SNP champion Angus Robertson holding his head in his hands. Unable to be so expressive, Labour MPs instead closed their eyes in disbelief.
It was left up to Tory MP Tim Loughton to mock the hairy Leftie's efforts with a reference to the assassination of Julius Caesar by Brutus and the other Roman conspirators.
"Today is the Ides of March and yet again Brutus opposite missed badly," he declared. Indeed.
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