RICHARD Leonard has been on a bit of a roll at FMQs lately, putting Nicola Sturgeon on the spot and reducing her MSPs to an uneasy fidgety silence.

It couldn’t last. Oh no.

Detail, it turns out, is the Scottish Labour leader’s Kryptonite. For one thing, he seems hazy on how the Budget works. This is not a recipe for success, even in Labour.

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Picking a round number to spend (an extra £1bn this year) doesn’t fly anymore, because the Scottish Fiscal Commission now decrees what is realistic.

This was a Labour idea, but apparently passed him by. The FM’s stomping boots did not. He will bear their mark for years.

Ms Sturgeon was already in a feral mood after Ruth Davidson suggested the SNP should cut waste instead of raising taxes on her blameless filthy rich chums.

The real waste is “the waste of space that is the Tory party in this chamber,” the FM hissed.

Most Scots backed the Government, she added.

Ms Davidson was sceptical. “I’m not the one that just lost a third of my seats at the last election,” she laughed. The FM pulsed malignantly, like one of those big eggs in Alien.

Mr Leonard then touted his napkin-based plan to fix society.

“Why doesn’t Ms Sturgeon just tax the rich, like? There’s lots of ‘em and they’re just standing around like money-covered sheep, tha knows.”

The reason, Ms Sturgeon grimaced, is that the rich bolt when taxes soar and you get less cash than before. Factor in that and a bunch of other flaws and your £1bn is nearer £300m.

”I don’t know why the FM is so pessimistic,” pouted Mr Leonard. “We think it’s right.”

But what about the Scottish Fiscal Commission?! Ms Sturgeon practically screamed. Offering a policy that ignores their view is utterly incompetent.

“Under Richard Leonard’s leadership, Labour has even less credibility than before. However, let us give him credit: that is some achievement.”

Mr Leonard’s lip trembled. “It’s good to see that we have moved on from the personal insults of last week,” he gulped.

“Awwww,” MSPs chorused. “Diddums needs a nap.”

No doubt inspired by the miners, Mr Leonard kept digging. The FM was “relying on Reaganomics,” he declared.

The chamber howled in nostalgic laughter. That was 30 years ago, old hands recalled in disbelief. Mr Leonard, who still lives in the 1980s, seemed nonplussed.

“Where to start?” sighed Mr Sturgeon. “The incompetence, incoherence and sheer incredibility of what we have heard is mind boggling.”

The Labour leader looked crushed. “Why can’t she be less like Maggie Thatcher and more like that nice Mr Gorbachev?”