Well, were you left enraptured by all the salivating tittle-tattle of Strictly’s Dance of Shame? No, me neither. I would have been more beguiled by a three-hour lecture on the history of dust to be honest.

Here at The Herald, this scribe regularly performs a glance of shame when I peer gingerly over the top of the computer having submitted the weekly column and catch a glimpse of a despondent sports editor wearily poring over the contents, slumping back in his seat and developing the kind of grisly, tortured rictus of a gargoyle on a decaying Gothic buttress.

Over in the USA, meanwhile, at least Bernhard Langer had something to smile about at the weekend. It’s now 11 years since this evergreen German began his senior service in the over-50s ranks and there is no sign of him easing up. The 61-year-old’s rampaging six-shot victory in the SAS Championship in North Carolina on Sunday was his 38th title among the golden oldies and he became the first player to win four Champions Tour crowns in his 60s. It’s an astonishing plunder.

For all those golfers out there of a more redoubtable vintage – yes, perhaps even you sitting there reading this and questioning whether thrashing and swiping away at a little dimpled ba’ is really worth the remorseless anguish – Langer remains truly inspirational.

Fitness, spirituality, healthy eating and a drouth for competition that remains unquenchable are all part and parcel of the Langer approach.

Funnily enough, your correspondent tried adopting these attributes in an attempt to aid the production process of the Tuesday twitterings but fitness, spirituality and healthy eating were swiftly cast aside after the first couple of paragraphs while the only thing that could satisfy the drouth was a robust tumbler of Chenin Blanc once it was all winkled out.

“I still want to play to the best Bernhard Langer can play,” said the bold Bernhard. “I don’t think I need to prove anything, but I love competing, I love winning or being in the hunt. As long as I can do that, I think you’re going to see me out here.”

At this rate, Langer will still be knocking off the wins when this scribbler is reaching for the nibbie and going for cut-price meals at the Day Centre.

The ageing process doesn’t come itself, of course. “Things are hurting and aching that didn’t hurt 10 or 20 years ago, but that’s

life,” noted Langer. You sometimes wonder what state some of the younger generation will be in later down the line in this crash, bang, wallop age of push-it-to-the-limit-and-beyond athleticism?

With the physical tolls of the modern game adding to the general ravages, they may be lucky to be competing in their late-30s let alone their 60s.

As for fit-as-a-fiddle Langer? Well, there’s clearly still plenty of golfing life left in this auld yin from Anhausen.

Despite the sodden lumps of acclaim that regularly get shovelled over him, however, there remain plenty of cynics who are outspokenly sceptical of Langer’s putting technique. The can of worms that was opened up in the wake of the ban on the anchored method of putting, a style Langer adopted to overcome the heebie-jeebies and has since had to adapt, has led to locker room mutterings, accusations and aspersions being cast that he is still anchoring.

You can understand the point of view. Watching him execute a stroke on the green, with the handle of his putter right next to his chest, just about requires you to take a CT scan to ascertain whether it is actually anchored or not. But that is the ambiguity of the rule and one that seems to have produced more grey areas than that 50 Shades of whatdoyoucallit.

For a man of great diligence and nobility, being branded a cheat has been the ultimate indignity. “I don’t understand it because I’m a man of integrity and the last thing I want to do is break rules and be known as cheating,” said Langer in a defence that he has been forced to mount on numerous occasions in recent years.

The shame for golf is that many of Langer’s detractors have opted to relinquish the

game’s fundamental trust in the player. My word is my honour? There are plenty who still need convincing ...